Can a 16 Plus Stone Man Become Anorexic?

(To read my cancer story from the beginning start here – April / May 2018 – You Have Cancer)

I’ll start this post by apologising to the real Anorexia sufferers out there, as I obviously was never really Anorexic it more of a small obsession and a fad with me, which true Anorexia sufferers can find annoying much like true OCD sufferers don’t like it when people who aren’t OCD sufferers say Oh, that’s my OCD when they do something funny, or people say they are on Glutton free diets when it’s a fad and lifestyle choice rather than for medical reasons.

Anyway back to my story, it’s now early April 2019, I was down to just over 10 stone (from 16 1/2 at start of 2018)

I had gone through various wardrobe changes.

Before even having my operation I had lost 2 stone and my XXL clothes were now baggy, I didn’t bother buying anything new as was expecting to be in hospital for at least 3 weeks (it ended up being 7)

The week after being discharged I bought some new size 34 trousers and a couple of XL tops which kept me going for a few months, but were also getting baggy by Christmas.

For Christmas I got some size 32 trousers and a mixture of large tops (jumpers) and a couple of medium t-shirts and polo tops

By February, even my size 32 trousers were getting baggy and my medium tops were a bit loose, so I bought a pair of size 30 trousers and small t-shirts

By April I was at my lightest and I was determined to get down to 10 stone and get comfortable in to some size 28 trousers and only in small or XS tops

It was around then my wife was mentioning how scrawny I was getting, but I was having none of it
I was going to the gym and trying to build up my muscles but more for definition than anything else.

I was now checking the scales 3 times a day, was starting to drink fortisips and virtually stopped eating again

I had started on just 3 or 4 fortisips a day whist still eating but then thought, rather than having any breakfast I would have 2 fortisips together, then at lunchtime I would have another 2 fortisips and nothing else until I got to the stage where I was having 8 fotisips a day but very little else.

I told everyone it was because eating was uncomfortable but in reality it was because I was determined to get under 10 stone and in to my 28 jeans

The problem was, not only was I looking scrawny, I was also getting weaker, my shuffling was getting worse and going to the gym was becoming a bind.

Fortunately, I never did actually get under 10 stone (10 stone 2 was my lightest), I managed to pull myself back together, started having a Weetabix in the morning, soup at lunchtime and an evening meal again.

Looking back on it now it was quite frightening, it was only a very brief time, but I was almost obsessed with getting under 10 stone, I just wanted to be able to say I’m 9 stone something.

By May I was back up to 10 stone 5 and starting to feel a lot better, the next problem was I was now becoming dependent on drinking my Fortisips and I was now always having 2 at a time in my perfect fortisip mug that held 2 fortisips and when topped to the brim with cold water was pure Fortisip perfection.

The perfect Fortisip Mug 🙂

Story continues here – 12 Months on From Being Told I Have Cancer

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